A story of growing up, growing apart and falling short, this “intimate and expansive” new play is “theatrical magic” (BroadwayWorld). The Real Ones “cements Waleed Akhtar’s standing as a fearless writer with oodles of talent and bravura” (The Guardian).
The “perfectly cast” ensemble (London Theatre 1) includes an “excellent, incredibly likable” (London Theatre) Nathaniel Curtis (It’s A Sin) as Zaid alongside a “superb” (Time Out) Mariam Haque (Black Mirror) as Neelam.
“I love you. Like genuinely I love you. You’re a real one.”
Best friends Zaid and Neelam shared a dream: get away, make it as playwrights, build a future where they’re free to be themselves. Together, always.
Years later, things are far from what they expected. Zaid’s life has kinda stalled – half out the closet, living at home and still chasing the dream. While Neelam’s has taken a completely different path, as she chooses to prioritise her own happiness.
As their lives pull further apart and a mess of things left unsaid hangs between them, it becomes less and less clear if they’ll ever find a way back to each other.
The limited run of this “beautifully observed, bittersweet drama” (Time Out) has been extended, with performances now until 26 October.
Looking for show information and content guidance?
The Real Ones Self-Care Guide and Content Warnings
16 October - 26 OctoberFrom £15
16, 23 OctoberFrom £15
19, 26 OctoberFrom £15
Our ticket prices increase with demand, so book early to guarantee seats at the best price. Click here to find out more.
From £30.
Book a £15 Count Me In ticket, join as a member or nab a season ticket. Find out more at bushtheatre.co.uk/save.
14+
Please note, this production contains strobe lighting, flashing lights, and loud noises including high frequency feedback sounds. See the Self-Care Guide and Content Warnings for more information.
Saturday 21st September at 2:30pm & Thursday 10th October at 7:30pm
Thursday 26th September at 7:30pm & Saturday 5th October at 2:30pm
Saturday 28th September at 2:30pm & Thursday 3rd October at 7:30pm
Saturday 28th September at 1:30pm & Thursday 3rd October at 6:30pm
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Anisha Fields is a Set and Costume Designer, and graduate of the Bristol Old Vic Theatre School. She was the recipient of the Leverhulme Arts Scholarship, resident at the RSC 2018-2019. She was named as one of the Guardian’s 12 Theatre Stars to Watch, and was a finalist for Told by an Idiot’s Naomi Wilkinson Award 2019. She is an Associate Artist at Theatre Iolo.
Theatre includes: English (RSC / Kiln); The Limit (Linbury, Royal Opera House); Some Demon (Arcola / Bristol Old Vic); Octopolis, Blackout Songs (Hampstead); Mom, How Did You Meet The Beatles? (Chichester); Squirrel (Unicorn/ Mac/ The Egg/ Bath Theatre Royal); Pandemonium (Soho); Wendy (The Egg / Bath Theatre Royal); Walworth Farce (Southwark); Kes (Bolton Octagon/Theatre By The Lake); Owl at Home (Theatr Iolo).
Anthony Simpson-Pike is a director, dramaturg and writer. He was Deputy Artistic Director at the Yard Theatre, Resident Director at Theatre Peckham and Associate Director at the Gate Theatre.
Recent directorial work includes: Samuel Takes a Break… (Yard); Beautiful Thing (Stratford East); Grenfell: In the Words of Survivors (National – transferred to St Ann’s Warehouse in New York in April 2024); Olivier Award winning The P Word and Lava (nominated for Best Director at the Black British Theatre Awards) (both Bush); An Octoroon (Abbey, Dublin – nominated for Best Production, Irish Times Theatre Awards).
Recent dramaturgical credits include: Now, I See (Stratford East); Much Ado About Nothing (RSC); Samskara (Yard); Hotline with Produced Moon (Tron); Dear Young Monster by Pete McHale (The Queer House); Coup de Grace (Royal Court).
Ashen Gupta (they/them) is a director, facilitator and musician, whose work spans new writing for the stage, opera and short film. Much of their work is political in nature and has a focus on marginalised communities (particularly those of the South Asian diaspora and the queer community) as well as having musical elements.
Theatre includes: Brown Sheep (VAULT); Chasing Hares, Khab Jeetigi (both Young Vic); Jack and the Beanstalk (Stratford East); Laughing Boy (Jermyn Street / Theatre Royal Bath); NW Trilogy (Kiln); Pygmalion (Lyric Hammersmith).
Opera includes: Carmen, Gloriana (London Coliseum); The Promise Opera (UK tour).
Short Film includes: I Threw It (Old Vic); JINEOLOGÎ (Shoreditch Town Hall); Living Newspaper (Royal Court); TWENTYTWENTY (Young Vic).
Christopher Nairne was awarded OffWestEnd.com’s Best Lighting Designer award in 2016 for Teddy at Southwark Playhouse. He was recently shortlisted at the inaugural Profile Awards for his work on Blackout Songs at Hampstead Theatre.
Other theatre includes: Mischief Theatre’s Groan Ups (West End & UK tour); Boy Parts, Chasing Bono (Soho); Tom Fool, Mayfly (Orange Tree); Samuel Takes a Break…, This Beautiful Future (Yard); Infamous (Jermyn Street); Jeeves & Wooster in Perfect Nonsense, The Last Temptation of Boris Johnson (UK tours); Suzy Storck (Gate / France tour); Preludes (Southwark); The Legend of Sleepy Hollow, The Beautiful Game, A Little Princess (Other Palace); Jerusalem (Watermill); Speech & Debate, BU21 (Trafalgar Studios); Complicite’s Lionboy (world tour).
Opera work includes: L’Agrippina (Barber Opera); Madame Butterfly, Jephtha, Macbeth (Iford Arts); Belshazzar (Trinity Laban); Vivienne (Linbury, ROH); La Bohème (OperaUpClose, 2011 Olivier Award Winner).
Gurkiran Kaur is a voice, accent and dialect coach from London. She holds a BA Drama and Theatre Studies (Royal Holloway), completed actor training (The Bridge Theatre Training Company) and has a MA Voice Studies (The Royal Central School of Speech and Drama). Gurkiran works at a number of drama schools and has coached a number of graduate productions and showcases. Gurkiran is part of The Voice And Speech Teaching Associations’ EduCore Leadership Team and serves as a Junior Board Member. Gurkiran honours Ancient practices to approach voice work and believes in serving the people in the space ensuring inclusivity, equity and accessibility.
Credits: Extinct (Stratford East); Queens of Sheba (Soho Theatre & Nouveau Riche); NW Trilogy (Kiln); How To Save The Planet When You’re A Young Carer And Broke (Boundless); Best of Enemies (Young Vic & Headlong); Chasing Hares (Young Vic & Uncut); I Wonder If (Young Vic); Red Pitch (also West End), Favour, The P Word, Paradise Now, Sleepova, A Playlist For The Revolution (Bush); Lotus Beauty (Hampstead & Tamasha); Henry VIII (Globe); Offside (Futures Theatre); Marvin’s Binoculars, Anansi The Spider (Unicorn); The Climbers (Theatre By The Lake); Finding Home (Curve); The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel (Noel Coward); Silence (Donmar & Tara); A Dead Body In Taos (Fuel); Unexpected Twist (Royal & Derngate); Wuthering Heights (China Plate); I Wanna Be Yours (Melbourne Theatre Company); The Empress, Falkland Sound (Royal Shakespeare Company); Brassic FM (Gate); A Poem For Rabia (Tarragon Theatre, Toronto); The Full Monty (Everyman, Cheltenham & Buxton Opera House); Good Karma Hospital (ITV & Tiger Aspect Productions) and Hotel Portofino (ITV, PBS & Eagle Eye).
Iskandar Sharazuddin is a theatre artist, Associate at Headlong and the Joint Artistic Director of Ellandar Productions, a British East and Southeast Asian theatre company.
Selected credits as Movement Director: King Troll (New Diorama); The Bleeding Tree (Southwark – Nominated Best Movement/Choreography, Off West End Awards); Liberation Squares (Nottingham / Brixton House / UK Tour – Nominated Best Ensemble, Off West End Awards); The Garden of Words (Park); Worth (New Earth / Storyhouse Live / Arcola); A Play for the Living in a Time of Extinction (Headlong / Barbican); Blackout Songs (Hampstead – Nominated Achievement in Affiliate Theatre, Olivier Awards); Satyagraha, Così fan tutte (English National Opera).
As Dance-Dramaturg & Puppetry Director: (un)written • (un)heard (Fringe World Festival Western Australia – Winner: International Dance & Physical Theatre Award).
As Associate Movement Director: The Climbers (Theatre By The Lake).
Selected credits as a Director: The Lonesome Death of Eng Bunker (Kakilang / Omnibus); harmony. 天人合一 (York Theatre Royal); Turandot (Grimeborn Opera Festival – Nominated Best Opera Production & Winner Best Opera Performance, Off West End Awards).
He is the Resident Director & Puppetry Captain of My Neighbour Totoro (RSC / Barbican / West End) and former Resident & Dance Captain on How To Train Your Dragon: Live (DreamWorks SKG / Global Creatures).
James Dawson is a Freelance Production Manager for theatre, opera and dance working across London, nationally and internationally with a passion for touring work, performance art and community projects.
Recent projects include: interactive children’s play space REPLAY (Southbank Centre); A View From The Bridge (Headlong); Love & Rebellion Festival (Birmingham Rep); Marikiscrycrycry’s GONER (global tour).
James has worked as a production manager with Young Vic Theatre, Unicorn Theatre, Hampstead Theatre, Battersea Arts Centre, Bush Theatre, Pace Live entertainment, National Youth Theatre, Chichester Festival Theatre and The Yard Theatre.
For the Bush: Olivier Award winning Sleepova, and The P Word, and Olivier nominated A Playlist for The Revolution.
Theatre includes: G (Royal Court); The Comeuppance (Almeida); The Flea; Samuel Takes a Break; Multiple Casualty Incident (The Yard); Sweat (Royal Exchange, Manchester).
Maariyah Sharjil is a designer and supervisor.
She is a recent first-class graduate from BA Design for Performance at the Royal Central School of speech and Drama (2021). Before her design training, Maariyah worked at Sands Films as a costume constructor.
Her most recent productions include; Assistant Costume Supervisor for The Father and the Assassin (National Theatre), Costume Designer for The Key Workers’ Cycle (Almeida).
She has a passion for detailed research and often has an expansive reading list that inspires her work. The heart of her practice is turning the stories of minority communities and the diaspora into a visual language while also embedding historical and cultural themes into her work and designs.
Matt Powell (they/she/he) is a non-binary, Offie-finalist video designer, musical theatre creative and queer practitioner based in the East Midlands. They are a PhD candidate exploring LGBTQ+ representation in musical theatre at the University of Wolverhampton.
Video Design and Digital credits include: New Year (Birmingham Opera); Marie Curie – A New Musical, Rebecca (Charing Cross); Laughing Boy (Jermyn Street / Theatre Royal Bath); Sherlock Holmes and the Poison Wood (Watermill); EXhibitionists (King’s Head); I Really Do Think That This Will Change Your Life (Mercury Theatre / Colchester – Finalist The Stage Award for Innovation): Gypsy in Concert (Manchester Opera House for Hope Mill Theatre); Ride (The Old Globe / Curve / Southwark); Animal (Hope Mill / Park – Offie Finalist); Accidental Death of an Anarchist (Theatre Royal Haymarket / Sheffield / Lyric Hammersmith); Blow Down (Leeds Playhouse); Rumi: The Musical (D’asha Performing Arts Festival / London Coliseum); How A City Can Save the World (Sheffield); A-Typical Rainbow (Turbine); Flight (RCM); But What If You Die (Camden People’s Theatre); Old Friends (Digital); Bloody Difficult Women (Riverside); Santa Must Die (Alphabetti); Magdalene (Arcola Outside); Snowflake (Lowry); 34 (Aria Entertainment / Lowry); Public Domain (Vaudeville / Southwark); The Blazing World (University of the Arts, Philadelphia); On Hope: A Digital Song Cycle (Other Palace); Plaza (Royal Central School of Speech and Drama); American Idiot (Derby).
Directing credits include: Rent (May Hall); Santa Must Die (Leeds Playhouse / Red Ladder); Nativity: The Musical, Crazy for You (Derby); The Unconventionals (VAULT); Is He Musical (Curve / Other Palace).
Rebecca Natalini graduated with a BA in Stage Management from the Royal Central School of Speech and Drama and she is very excited to be working at the Bush Theatre for the first time.
Recent stage management theatre credits include: Pride and Prejudice, Scenes from RENT – A Staged Performance (Curve); A Midsummer Night’s Dream (New Diorama): Zoe’s Peculiar Journey Through Time (UK and Norway tour); Pride & Prejudice* (*sort of) (UK tour).
Rhea Cosford studied Drama at Queen Mary University of London before going on to train in Stage and Events Management at Royal Welsh College of Music and Drama.
Stage management theatre credits include: 2:22, A Ghost Story (Criterion); Trade (Pleasance); Walk Right Back – The Everly Brothers Story (UK Tour); Phantasmagoria (Kali /Southwark); What Would Jarvis Do? (Omnibus); Multiple Casualty Incident (Yard).
Titilola Dawudu is the Associate Dramaturg at the Bush Theatre, heading up the Literary department. She works with the Artistic Director and Associate Artistic Director to commission and nurture news plays and ideas, working closely with writers, managing writing groups and the talent development pipeline.
Titilola was the dramaturg for an early iteration at Ovalhouse of Tyrell Williams’s award-winning play Red Pitch. She dramaturgically supported some of the RSC’s 37 Plays winners, most notably Dreaming and Drowning by Kwame Owusu.
Titilola co-created and edited Hear Me Now Audition Monologues for Actors of Colour with Tamasha, published by Oberon Books. Hear Me Now Volume Two was published in August 2022 by Methuen Drama. As a writer, Titilola has written for Theatre Royal Arojah in Abuja, Nigeria, Theatre Peckham, Ovalhouse, Beyond Face and Soho Theatre.
Waleed Akhtar is a writer and actor. He was the recipient of the 2023 Peggy Ramsay/Film 4 bursary and was awarded an MGC Futures bursary winner in 2021. He won Most Promising Playwright at The Offies 2023 and was nominated for the equivalent at The Evening Standard Awards. His play, The P Word won the Outstanding Achievement in an Affiliate Theatre at the 2023 Olivier Awards, alongside a nomination for Best Play at the WGGB Awards in 2022.
Work for theatre includes: The P Word (Bush); Kabul Goes Pop: Music Television Afghanistan (Brixton House / Mercury / HighTide); Sholay on the Big Screen (Off Stage Theatre, Bush & Nubian Life); I Don’t Know What To Do (co-creator – VAULT).
His translation work includes: Alexis Michalik’s The Art of Illusion (Hampstead); Famalam (Season 4 contributor); Sketchtopia and Newsjack (BBC Radio 4 – contributor); Lost Paradise (Short film, B3 Media/UK Film Council).
He is currently under commission at the Almeida Theatre and Unicorn Theatre.
Work for television includes: The Road Trip (Paramount+ / 42MP) and a television adaptation of his hit play The P Word (House Productions). He is a current participant of the BBC Studios Spotlight scheme developing an original drama with Sid Gentle Films. His original audio play Mrs Bibi will be released by Audible in 2025.
As an actor his credits include Cruella, Salmon Fishing in the Yemen and The Great.
XANA is a freestyle live loop musician, composer, spatial sound artist, music supervisor and a haptic specialist sound designer developing accessible audio systems for live art spaces. XANA is the music science and technology lead and project mentor supporting artists and inventors at audio research label Inventing Waves.
Recent credits include: Dead Girls Rising (Silent Uproar, UK Tour); Shifters (also West End), Elephant, Sleepova (Olivier Award), The P Word (Olivier Award), Strange Fruit (all Bush); The Architect (ATC/GDIF); Beautiful Thing (Stratford East); Imposter 22, Word:Play, Living Newspaper #4 (Royal Court); Anna Karenina (Edinburgh Lyceum / Bristol Old Vic); The Trials, Marys Seacole (Donmar); Earthworks, Sundown Kiki: Reloaded, The Collaboration, Sundown Kiki, Changing Destiny, Fairview, Ivan and the Dogs (Young Vic); …cake (Theatre Peckham); Who Killed My Father (Tron); as british as a watermelon (Contact); Hyde and Seek (Guildhall); Burgerz (Hackney Showroom); King Troll [The Fawn] (New Diorama); Everyday (Deafinitely); Black Holes (The Place); Hive City Legacy (Roundhouse); Glamrou: From Quran to Queen, Curious, Half-Breed (all Soho); Blood Knot, Guards at the Taj (Orange Tree); Main Character Energy, Samuel Takes a Break…, SEX SEX MEN MEN (all Yard); Everything I Own, Is Dat Yu Yeah (Briton House).
XANA is the recipient of the 2023 Best Sound Design award from the Black British Theatre Awards (BBTA).